In Rudyard Kipling’s short story, two former British soldiers burst into the cramped offices of a Lahore newspaper, and tell the bewildered editor (a fellow freemason) that petty Raj bureaucracy has forced them to a decision: they are going away to be kings in their own land. The editor’s response is to be as soothing as he can.

Danny and Peachey assure their host that they are quite sane and sober: indeed, they have a binding contract to touch neither liquor nor women, but to go to Kafiristan in northeast Afghanistan, and there use their drill-sergeant’s skills to win the confidence of local tribal leaders before they overthrow them, and create their own dynasty instead.

115 words