In Think and Speak (1929), NL Clay asked his students questions such as:

Why was it stupid of the nurse to wake up her patient to give him a sleeping draught?

This is not as trivial as it sounds: it is an exercise in constructing various kinds of clause, especially causal and conditional. Try answering the question, and you’ll soon see.

This kind of humour was very popular with the ancient Greeks. Some examples were translated for us by American clergyman Charles Clinch Bubb (1876-1036), from a collection credited to Hierocles of Alexandria (5th century AD). The role of the addlepated nurse was taken by the stock character of the Pedant, someone who was just too literal-minded for his own good.

Why was it stupid? ...

1 A pedant whilst swimming almost choked to death. He made an oath that he would not go into the water again until he had first learned to swim well.

2 One of twin brothers died and a pedant meeting the survivor asked him, ‘Did you die, or was it your brother?’.

3 A son of a pedant being sent to battle by his father promised to return bringing the head of one of his foes. He replied, ‘Even though I see you coming without any head, I shall be glad.’

If these seem too easy, see how short you can make your answer, for example, 21 words or fewer.

Or, write down what the Pedant should have said.